The Eloquent Elocutions of COTWWSB

The wittiest and most remarkable words ever uttered by us in chat. Ph3ar what we say for we pwn the written word. Below are all of our quotes, but you can also browse by name.

Viewing 701-750 of 785 quotes, newest first:

Brandon: i think i'll be a male stripper when i get older.

Brandon: someone should post on cotwwsb that we had our first three way on thanksgiving!

Brandon: Sometimes i pick my belly button!

Hoppy: oh dude, some naked british dude in a bathtub
Hoppy: public television rules

Nicole: i usually chat in nothing but cowboy boots and chaps
Nicole: but that's for another story

Morgan: I really ought to remember I have ice cream in my pocket before I sit down.

Brandon: beastiality is my middle name!

Brandon: Does Dick do sex?

Morgan: I can shower with Juan McOso!

Nicole: i always wondered why they say "holy" shit. did the pope bless it?

Meaghan: it is starting to freak me out that you're writing porn about me.
Julie: I'm so not!
Julie: I'm *generating* porn about you.

Morgan: Garby decided to call me Captain Morgan since that's what he drank tonight. My new slogan is Captain Morgan - All the fun without the hangover.
Julie: LOL
Julie: can we set sail with you and never leave dry land?

Brandon: oddly enough, most of my spelling si better when i had some to drink
Brandon: when i have some to drink

Julie: kroners sound funny, like they should only be used to buy cheeseburgers

Meaghan: I saw a radioactive mosquito on my windshield once.
Meaghan: it bit me and I became Womansquito.
Loren: With special blood-sucking action?
Julie: what exactly are your powers?
Meaghan: of course
Julie: the power to make people incredibly itchy
Meaghan: well, I can make people really itchy.
Meaghan: don't forget bumpy
Hoppy: your weakness is giant blue buzzing lights though

Hoppy: hoppy brain is scrambled
Holly: I think we're all confused
Holly: Maybe the drugs have a shared brain effect
Hoppy: well, that would make sense
Hoppy: between golly's drugz and scooter's crack, the brain is in trouble

Holly: well, a side affect of my drugs is confusion
Holly: side effect
Julie: word usage confusion?
Holly: all types of confusion
Hoppy: at least you know sentences you should have subjects and verbs
Julie: you're not like "drugs me confuse!"
Hoppy: coolie, you just realized your example did have a subject and a verb?
Hoppy: or did you realize... not you just realized

Hoppy: grass stains or death, i take the grass stains

Hoppy: funfortunate seems like it should mean something
Hoppy: like when bad things happen to other people and we laugh at them, it is funfortunate for us
Loren: I remember one time, in school, a boy tripped on a ball and smacked his head on the pavement. He was bleeding and teachers ran over. Everyone started laughing. That was funfortunate.
Loren: I, myself, was horrified. But the others got a kick out of it.
Hoppy: that is the EXACT meaning of funfortunate
Julie: once I accidentally stuck a knife up my nose while chopping carrots
Hoppy: if we had been there, we might have laughed at your funfortunate accident
Hoppy: accidentally?
Hoppy: why was your nose so close to the carrots?
Julie: yes, I can't really explain

Loren: Imagine that tombstone. He fell through a veil.
Loren: the end.

Julie: and I was really confused. I didn't remember muppets in Safe
Hoppy: it's in the "lost scenes"
Hoppy: simon heals a wounded muppet while river reads it's mind
Julie: best mental image ever
Hoppy: really the villagers didn't mind so much that she could read the kid's mind, but the muppet thing FREAKED them out
Julie: River "I sense... you want... cookies."
Hoppy: because muppets don't have minds
Hoppy: and now there needs to be a River/Muppet manipulation
Julie: The Tams + Cookie Monster 4Eva
Hoppy: *mutters* hands of blue... me want cookie...

Hoppy: i'm going to buy bacon-cheeseburger.net and make that my fanlistings collective

Bonster: The universe is not making me happy!!

Morgan: It's like the owl post but with birds!
Morgan: Okay pretend that statement wasn't stupid.
Brandon: I don't get it.
Morgan: Owls are birds.
Brandon: oooooooh.
Brandon: I thought they were penguins.

Holly: maybe it's meant to be a dollar sign sideways
Hoppy: so he's eating money?
Holly: yes
Hoppy: well, that makes PERFECT sense then
Holly: I knew it!
Hoppy: who doesn't love eating money?
Holly: I don't know anyone
Hoppy: it's good with toast and bacon
Holly: I prefer it with pancakes
Hoppy: i have yet to try it that way, but perhaps tomorrow i will

Brandon: The part that really grabbed my attention is the poking of the butthole

Elise: who is miranda?
Holly: Don't worry.


Holly: haha, apparently a side effects of my new drugz is confusion...
Meaghan: BUAHAHAHA
Meaghan: you need more confusion like ... I don't even know.
Holly: lol, I know
Holly: this could be bad
Holly: however! I can now blame my confusion on teh srugz
Holly: *drugz
Meaghan: buahahahaha
Meaghan: *adds to quotes*
Holly: lol
Holly: I'm getting quoted a lot today!
Meaghan: well you keep saying odd things
Holly: Well, I can;t help that.
Holly: It's the drugz!

Holly: by the way, I've officially changed my name to Aragorn
Hoppy: like legally, Holly?
Holly: no, just online

Meaghan: consitensy?? what the fuck is that?

Hoppy: we are awfully bootylicious
Julie: groinolicious infact

Loren: they just arent ready for the cotwwsb jelly

(edited out the many instances of LMAO, LOL and ROFL)
Hoppy: i've seen dick
Nicole: *stares at hoppit*
Hoppy: well, i have seen dick, scooter!
Meaghan: hey Nicole
Meaghan: I've seen dick too
Holly: I've also see dick
Hoppy: coolie owns dick
Meaghan: actually, it got removed
Holly: coolie loves dick
Hoppy: yeah, but then i gave dick to coolie
Nicole: i haven't seen dick
Meaghan: you can't let dick control your life!
Meaghan: no it got removed again!
Holly: but she let dick get removed
Hoppy: well apparently she doesn't love dick enough
Hoppyt: i guess i should have given dick to someone else
Hoppy: *is hurt that nobody loves dick enough*
Meaghan: Hoppy, I think you should re-give Coolie Dick, even if she doesn't apply. because that would be funny.
Hoppy: i didn't even notice dick got removed
Hoppy: but, i think i will have to give coolie some a fake dick
Meaghan: I bet she would get dick up this time if you gave it back to her. O:-)
Hoppy: she'd open her e-mail and be like, "Surprise! You've got dick!"

Bonster: Screw you, hippie!

Hoppy: the secret language of HTLM
Meaghan: hyper text language of moron

Hoppy: Yoda totally defriended her ass.
Hoppy: "Defriended you, I have."

Hoppy: i type like monkey
Loren: Hey, Monkeys type like you wouldnt believe
Hoppy: if you give them enough time
Loren: They will type accurately, smoke a cigar, AND pick their asses at the same time
Hoppy: i don't have that kind of talent

Nicole: Jesus is on my wishlist

Hoppy: Porn is really the most unspoilable genre of film/television... it always ends the same way

Julie: I'm really not sure you can get much geekier than comparing your new PHP development partners to sci-fi characters.

Julie: boioioing
Meaghan: pow!
Julie: bleeeech
Meaghan: cha cha cha
Nicole: screeeech!
Meaghan: whizz
Julie: whoooopwhooopwhooopwhoop
Nicole: beep beeep beep beep
Julie: mooooooooooo

Brandon: I have a Pegina.
Julie: you should call it a Venis. That's more womanly.

Nicole: I'm smooth, satisfying and will give you lung cancer and harm your baby.

Elise: then I have HQ weed
Loren: high quality weed, lol
Elise: Er, I mean HQ Weed pictures
Elise: dammit
Elise: Weeds!*
Loren: pass me some of that hq weed, man

Julie: just wear loose pants, then, because of the beltlessness, you will probably become pantsless and you can pretend it was an accident

Julie: manboobies < Mischa Barton's boobies < boobies

Hoppy: that's basically the whole point of the internet, clicking on boobs

Julie: I think I might can do it.

Hoppy: yeah, i'm herpes free and lovin' life, man

Brandon: i don't think penises smile.
Morgan: They may not smile but I think you can tell when they're happy.

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